do you know these movies
that kinda change your perspective, your view on life?
like afterwards, after you watch them
and leave the cinema you don't get them out of your head.
and you want to change something by yourself. in your life.
and maybe it's not even the movie itsself that stucks in your head
- it's the thoughts, the meaning and happiness or sadness
which the film made you feel.
and you want that as well.
but for real.
in your life.
i don't know if i am only speaking for myself.
if i am just a weirdo and totally alone with these kind of feelings.
but at the end of the story they are just making my life and my thoughts more miserable
than they were before.
because actually i just notice that there is something missing
in my life or in my head because of the film.
because i see how i want it to be
or how i would imagine it to be perfect.
i love those films.
but i also hate them more than everything.
i know that these are all fictionals movies
and that they aren't the reality.
but what if i want them to be real?
i want to believe in happy endings and in fairytales
and miracles and that everything is going to end up good
and if it's not good and perfect then that's not the end.
that's what makes me getting up in the morning day after day after day.
that's what makes me hope.
hope for the better days.
hope for a new tommorrow.
hope for my own hoplessness.
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